Mailwatch(ed) Forum

Tubby Isaacs wrote:Chris Philp seems to be starting a diplomatic incident with France. This is pure Farage.

I can’t empathise enough how dangerous the Tories are right now.

ITYM "emphasise"... but yes, this is indeed pure Farridge.

Should have sunk the cunt.

Diplomatic incident ? How so ?

More likely a disciplinary for the gunnery officer who missed.

Pure Farage shite.

Chris Felch has succeeded in nothing other than making a fool of himself. His couldn't make a diplomatic remark, let alone an incident.

Espèce de con.

The news here in France is obviously focussed on the fires in the south - a man has been arrested and is being held under garde a vue for arson - but did show a tiny clip of Philp the Wilp without comment. They weren't shooting at him, though I think they had every reason to. I'd have keel hauled the slimy little cunt.

And I rather like this:

Alex Andreou @sturdyalex.bsky.social

The Home Office promised to put a stop on cheap inflatables crossing the Channel, but somehow Chris Philp's ego got through.

I never realised just how weasel-like he looked until now.

But hey, I'm LEFTFILTH* so I would say that.

*An epithet I'd not heard before until a mate of mine said someone he knew used it in BTL comments on news stories.

kreuzberger wrote: ↑Tue Jul 28, 2026 6:27 pm Chris Felch has succeeded in nothing other than making a fool of himself. His couldn't make a diplomatic remark, let alone an incident.

Espèce de con.

Incident's putting it a bit strongly, but he's accused the French Government of firing guns to intimidate him and has been massively rude to them about how they're not stopping "illegal crossings" (the numbers have been down quite substantially, I thought).

This is a senior politician in what's mostly been the natural party of government we're talking about, hard though it sometimes is to believe that. It's not some obscure local politician. France will be massively pissed off.

With fires getting perilously close to Bordeaux, I think the French government has got far more important things on their mind than a minor British politician trying to score cheap political points - especially as he represents a party full of climate deniers.

https://www.france24.com/en/europe/2026 ... in-channel

Boiler wrote: ↑Tue Jul 28, 2026 7:49 pm With fires getting perilously close to Bordeaux, I think the French government has got far more important things on their mind than a minor British politician trying to score cheap political points - especially as he represents a party full of climate deniers.

https://www.france24.com/en/europe/2026 ... in-channel

Well indeed. This is massively insulting to an ally at the time of a massive crisis. Burnham ought to absolutely crucify the Tories for this.

There's a brief note on Le Figaro and there was a short strapline on France 24, but in general the French attitude is 'le meh'.

John Crace has been getting on Malcolm's tits recently, but this is classic:

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/20 ... rench-navy

Captain Chris “Hunter-Killer” Philp had been on patrol since first light in the Channel. While the rest of the country was still asleep, the Philpster was scanning the horizon for rubber dinghies full of illegal immigrants. Something he had never done in his previous life as immigration minister. Back then he had sought to rehouse new arrivals in hotels. Now he wanted to send them to a watery grave.

It had been a quiet morning. Too quiet. Just the one sighting of a child with a rubber ring paddling off the beach in Boulogne. But Hunter-Killer was taking no chances. All it takes is one child and before long there will be hundreds of thousands making the crossing with swimming aids bought from the local Carrefour. So the Philpster had called in the RAF. Minutes later, a Typhoon FGR4 had blasted the kid out of the water. Job done.

The next thing Hunter-Killer heard was the sound of 17 indistinct pops in the distance. “Get down,” he shouted to his crew. “We’re under attack.” Weirdly, no one on board the Philpster’s MTB disguised as a fishing vessel seemed remotely worried. How come they were so slow to sense danger? There again, few had the finely tuned antennae of the Philpster. Those years of training with the Special Boat Service had paid off.

Hunter-Killer threw himself on the floor of the wheelhouse, waiting for the gunshots to stop. “I think it’s safe now,” a deckhand said. “It was just some French sailor firing some shots from a handgun away from us into the sea. It wasn’t as if he was aiming at us or anything.

He pulled the burner phone out of his pocket and speed-dialled Kemi. “I’m under attack,” he gasped. “Even though the French aren’t shooting at me, they are definitely shooting at me. They don’t want me to stop any small boats crossing the Channel, even though I haven’t yet seen any small boats. We need to be on our guard. The smuggling gangs must now be using invisible dinghies.”

Kemi’s eyes lit up. If only she was prime minister, she would be able to launch a tactical first nuclear strike on Calais. OK, there might be some collateral damage in Kent but it would still be worth it. Instead, she had to order the Philpster to disengage with the enemy.

He is probably the most punchable Tory now Jenrick left... though Hunt is still an MP.

mattomac wrote: ↑Wed Jul 29, 2026 2:42 pm He is probably the most punchable Tory now Jenrick left... though Hunt is still an MP.

Damn you, now I am weighing up the merits of Nick Timothy, Mark Francois, Iain Duncan-Smith...

It's the lack of self awareness that gets me every time with these people. How can he not see that he's being a massive bell end? Imagine if this twat had a real job somewhere. His co workers would rip the piss out of him mercilessly.

He exists in a milieu of utter twats, bell-ends, saloon bar wankers and golf club bores. He just fits in.

And they're the ones who vote for him and the similar shades of shite.

The Tories saying there should be no care reform till the best possible use of money has been achieved.

Can you remember when they paused free schools till the process was 100 percentage efficient? Me neither. They just did as many as they could as fast as they could.

soulboy wrote: ↑Wed Jul 29, 2026 2:53 pm

mattomac wrote: ↑Wed Jul 29, 2026 2:42 pm He is probably the most punchable Tory now Jenrick left... though Hunt is still an MP.

Damn you, now I am weighing up the merits of Nick Timothy, Mark Francois, Iain Duncan-Smith...

Timothy is more of a nasty bastard, suppose Jenrick is. NDS is a bit of an embarrassment and laughable after his time as leader. Francois I wasn’t aware he was still an MP. But again a cosplaying prick that’s more laughable.

mattomac wrote: ↑Wed Jul 29, 2026 2:42 pm He is probably the most punchable Tory now Jenrick left... though Hunt is still an MP.

Hunt’s now regarded as wise party grandee. I kid you not.