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Re: Sralan's Twats, 2024 Edition!

Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2024 9:18 am
by Andy McDandy
So to the final and we're done for another year.

Who will win? The piemaker or the gym bunny? Both have the opportunity to launch their business to one of those big gala dinners you're vaguely surprised still happen (seriously, when I was a kid my parents were always going out to "dinner dances", yet you never hear of them nowadays) full of "business leaders" taking time out from providing commentary on every news story going.

Each contender gets to choose some of the sacked wannabes to help them. Most of them understand that it's no longer about them, and do a good enough job of supporting their teammate. Not all though. God Delusion is back, still convinced that he's the next Tarantino, while in fact he should be banned from any form of recording equipment in any medium ever. The teams design branding and create a virtual walkthrough space thing (why, we don't know). The finalists deliver speeches. Phil the Simple Pieman speaks movingly of his family history of making pies. The Blonde Bombsite explains her concept of user-friendly gyms, which seem identical to every other gym out there except for the absence of trainers. Sralan, dressed up like Trump meeting the late Queen, huffs and sniffs, and then it's back to the set - sorry, boardroom - to make a choice.

Phil blows his feet off by saying that for him it's not all about the money. The gym chain gets the money. Expect to see the Yorkshire Kipper fronting a GBNews "news discussion" programme within 12 months.