[Andy McDandy]

3 years of getting pissed up, then cram for the finals. Pretty sure Johnson did that.

[Youngian]

So, as I'm hearing it, Khan asked for Dick's plans to reform the Met. Dick produced a half-arsed draft, and Khan told her to go away and do it properly. She then quit.

Seems to be a common thread over the last few years. Excuse after excuse, then a hastily cobbled together effort at the last minute, and failing that (e.g. Brexit impact forecasts), the dog ate it.

I've said before that it feels like this lot never got past their schooldays, but I never realised it was this bad.

I’ve seen more professional comms from a computer distributor in Reading than the shoddy bullshit the government is turning out. But BlueKip are an embittered bourgeois d-list passed over in business, media and politics because they’re mediocrities at best.

[Tubby Isaacs]

First rule of politics here. If you're caught out, lie. Second rule, if you're caught out by Sadiq Khan or David Lammy, call them liars. None of your fans will check whether it's true.

[Boiler]

"I was on holiday in Israel"

[Tubby Isaacs]

Yeah but David Lammy's expenses (which don't seem to be particularly remarkable). What sort of prick would go for that meme? Oh.

[Boiler]

[Bones McCoy]

Went AWOL from the house today and left questions on the topic to a junior minister.

[mattomac]

First rule of politics here. If you're caught out, lie. Second rule, if you're caught out by Sadiq Khan or David Lammy, call them liars. None of your fans will check whether it's true.

Seen a tweet by Lammy that didn’t age well today… this one has, it hasn’t for “the prittster” mind.

[Andy McDandy]

Yvette Cooper and Roger Gale on form today in parliament, tearing her a new one - if she'd been present. Instead the fruit picker recruiter from Devon made some noises about security first and you couldn't just let anyone in.

[Nigredo]

Paraphrasing something I saw on Twitter but can't seem to find again:

Priti Patel is the type of person who'd unplug your life support to charge her phone.

[Andy McDandy]

Paraphrasing something I saw on Twitter but can't seem to find again:

Priti Patel is the type of person who'd unplug your life support to charge her phone.

The wonderful Alexei Sayle.

[Malcolm Armsteen]

'Wonderful'?

Funny as a runny chancre.

[Abernathy]

'Wonderful'?

Funny as a runny chancre.

I dunno. As a comic, I’ve laughed out loud at quite a lot of Alexei’s stuff (Bobby Chariot, etc). Unfortunately, Mr Sayle has drank deeply from the toxic chalice of Corbyn.

[Cyclist]

Meanwhile, the Home Office, headed by disgraced former Overseas Develop Minister, Piggi Patel, show how concerned they are for Ukrainian refugees...

A four-year-old Ukrainian refugee has been refused entry into the UK because his passport has recently expired, his family has said.

Platan's great-aunt Inesse Gwynne, who wants to bring him to Stockport, said his visa application was rejected.

The youngster and his mother Ruslana fled Ukraine after the Russian invasion but have only got as far as Italy.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... r-60869045

What was that joke about Ukrainians with British relatives being allowed in?

Ruslana, who studied Art at Manchester Metropolitan University in 2009, still has friends and connections here, Ms Gwynne said.

"Surely a child's passport, this small thing can be overlooked," she added.

"It has only been expired a few weeks. What does it matter?"

Earlier this month, the government launched the Ukraine family scheme, which allows Ukrainians to join family members or extend their stay in the UK.

The application process is free and those who successfully apply will be able to live, work and study in the UK and access public funds.

By Thursday, it had received 32,500 applications - just over a third of those people have received visas so far.

Don't it make yer proud

[Boiler]

See also: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-60859817

The mother of a teenager murdered in the Manchester Arena bombing is campaigning for the right to register the death of her child.

Caroline Curry, whose 19-year-old son Liam died, urged the home secretary to "look in her heart" and change the law.

Come the Glorious Revolution...

[davidjay]

See also: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-60859817

The mother of a teenager murdered in the Manchester Arena bombing is campaigning for the right to register the death of her child.

Caroline Curry, whose 19-year-old son Liam died, urged the home secretary to "look in her heart" and change the law.

Come the Glorious Revolution...

We're going to need a very big wall.

[Watchman]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... avery.html

Doesn’t Vacant have previous with how Israel “does things”!

[Boiler]

If ever a picture was needed for a "two minute hate", this one from the Beeb sums this vile creature up perfectly.

Screenshot 2022-04-18 at 09-14-35 BBC - Home.png (87.95 KiB) Viewed 2891 times

I note the toilet-paper section of the Fourth Estate are laying into Welby this morning.

[Youngian]

I note the toilet-paper section of the Fourth Estate are laying into Welby this morning.

If Johnson and his crackpot Brexit cult want to go to war with the Tory Party at prayer, its no skin off Labour’s nose.

[Watchman]

This one may be for the religious nutters thread
I’ve always found the phrase “the Tory party at prayer” an interesting one; I get the middle England, Christian thing, and turbulent priests aside, none too challenging for said demographic and allows them to feel good about themselves. However, cursory glance at how a good proportion of those who follow the Church of Rome in Britain think and what they believe in, will reveal thinking much in line with current Tory views on how they want society to react. JRM is a very much a thin end of the wedge, there are some quite extreme views out there, which don’t necessarily fit with a fair and just society