[Andy McDandy]

Apparently we used to marvel at them in the 70s. Having only been born in 1977, I cannot comment on the accuracy of this.

[satnav]

Next week he will be asking whatever happened to white dog poo.

[Bones McCoy]

I wonder whether Hitch has a side bet with Adrian Chiles.

The "Dullest columnist" trophy is at stake.



Next week: "Whatever happened to those stamps you could lick?"

[Bones McCoy]

Next week he will be asking whatever happened to white dog poo.

It rebranded from UKIP to Reform.

[Crabcakes]

Fixed it for him

I have noted a growing habit of government offices replying to my tiresome, nitpicky and overly frequent to the point of becoming a nuisance phone messages with emails, and the bad thing about emails is that, when I want to make out someone said something to me that I can frame in a certain way to indicate my dissatisfaction and/or their moral or intellectual inferiority, they can produce their copy of the message showing they said nothing of the sort and I’m just a joyless old sod of limited talent yet boundless ego who gets very upset when people who I believe are beneath me don’t call me ‘sir’.

[satnav]

Just spotted this utter bollox in Hitchens latest column.

I shall not be watching Adolescence, the Netflix drama about a killer schoolchild which is currently being showered with praise.

This is because those who have seen it tell me it makes no mention of drugs. A drama about teen violence at school which ignores drugs is like a series about the Queen which leaves out Her Majesty.

Children aged 11 are taking dangerous drugs in our dreadful schools. In some cases, these drugs are making them crazy.

Firstly the drama is excellent and well worth a watch and secondly are schools are not awash with drugs. I really can't remember the last time I heard of any incidents involving drugs in the secondary school where I work. We have lots of issues around vaping and kids posting inappropriate stuff on social media but drugs don't get a mention apart from in relation to staff being told to look out for any behaviour that might suggest pupils might be involved in county lines gangs.

When did Hitchens last visit a school or talk to a teacher?

[Malcolm Armsteen]

I first found drugs on a kid in 1973. No-one seemed to think this was a new thing...

I had my first kid up for attempted murder in 1975.

Yes, he should speak to teachers WHO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT EVERY DAY instead of writing bollocks about it in the safety of their home offices...

[Watchman]

Children aged 11 are taking dangerous drugs in our dreadful schools.

Does that include the likes of Eton?

[Youngian]

I shall not be watching .....

Has opened many a Hitchens piece over the years. He announced he wouldn't be watching the Death of Stalin as it was obviously made by frivolous pranksters with little respect for the victims. Despite many polite replies arguing in praise of the film's serious tone and reverence to it's source who recommend Hitchens sees it. Of course he hasn't.

[Rosvanian]

I finally gave up on Hitchens a few weeks back. When I say "gave up", I mean that I no longer give him the benefit of the doubt that he is not a crank despite his decades of professional contrarianism, ludicrous 'logic' and history of left then right extremism. His proclaimation that dyslexia is not a real condition was the straw that broke the camel's back. Still, I hesitate to call the man a "cunt", as reserved for the worst we identify here. Rather, the man is merely a massive arsehole, a bellend for the ages. And to think, the BBC for years saw fit to employ him and Mad Melanie Philips (now there's a cunt) as panelists on The Moral Maze.

[Rosvanian]

I finally gave up on Hitchens a few weeks back. When I say "gave up", I mean that I no longer give him the benefit of the doubt that he is not a crank despite his decades of professional contrarianism, ludicrous 'logic' and history of left then right extremism. His proclaimation that dyslexia is not a real condition was the straw that broke the camel's back. Still, I hesitate to call the man a "cunt", as reserved for the worst we identify here. Rather, the man is merely a massive arsehole, a bellend for the ages. And to think, the BBC for years saw fit to employ him and Mad Melanie Philips (now there IS a cunt) as the voice of authority panelists on The Moral Maze.

[Rosvanian]

I finally gave up on Hitchens a few weeks back. When I say "gave up", I mean that I no longer give him the benefit of the doubt that he is not a crank despite his decades of professional contrarianism, ludicrous 'logic' based on his interpretation of the 19th century Anglican version of morality and his history of left then conservative extremism. His proclamation that dyslexia is not a real condition was the straw that broke the camel's back. Still, I hesitate to call the man a "cunt", as reserved for the worst we identify here. Rather, the man is merely a massive arsehole, a bellend for the ages. And to think, the BBC for years saw fit to employ him and Mad Melanie Philips (now there IS a cunt) as the voice of authority panelists on The Moral Maze.

[Abernathy]

I sometimes wonder about his conversations and interactions with his late brother.

Christopher must have absolutely destroyed him on every argument.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.smry.ai/proxy?url=https%3A% ... diocy.html

It's been a while since we visited The Hitch, and - well - not much has changed.

Police are all useless so let's crowdfund some vigilante mobs. His wife's old school has changed its name and that's bad. ADHD doesn't exist and everyone should just pull themselves together. But then he turns to Ukraine, and its similarity (in his mind) with the First World War. Ready?

It is now 111 years since the British Empire committed suicide by entering the crazy, pointless First World War. Hundreds of thousands of our best men from all classes died before they could have children.

From being rich and solvent, we sank into debt within 18 months, a disgrace which ended with us defaulting on our gigantic World War One debt to the USA in 1934, of which we have not since paid a penny (anyone who thinks this isn’t true, and there’s always one such wiseacre, is invited to bet me £100 that I am wrong. Oh, please do).

Our naval supremacy and our world standing went down the drain. Most sensible people knew within months that the war was a costly disaster but they couldn’t stop it. This was because leaders on both sides, such as Germany’s Kaiser Wilhelm II, had whipped up patriotic sentiment to such a pitch they could not compromise.

Something similar has happened in Ukraine. Facts and reason about this war are unpopular. Sentiment and propaganda rule instead. So my guess is that death and demolition will just go on, and the vast new cemeteries will continue to spread across the blasted land.

If he could do subtlety, I'd suggest he could just as easily have been talking about Brexit.

[Rosvanian]

The problem for Hitch is that these days he's competing in a Pacific Ocean size pool of vicious hard right-wing cuntery which makes it much more difficult for him to stand out. It's a crying shame, I tell you.

[Youngian]

There was a sizeable hard right nationalist sentiment arguing Britain should have kept out of world wars in order to have maintained its empire and global superpower status while Johnny Foreigners ripped themselves apart.
It's been kind of forgotten by the headbangers amdist a sea of Churchill and WWII fetishising. A lost cause among many that keeps Brigadier Hitchens noticed.

[Bones McCoy]

There was a sizeable hard right nationalist sentiment arguing Britain should have kept out of world wars in order to have maintained its empire and global superpower status while Johnny Foreigners ripped themselves apart.
It's been kind of forgotten by the headbangers amdist a sea of Churchill and WWII fetishising. A lost cause among many that keeps Brigadier Hitchens noticed.

Those hard right nationalists ignore many inconvenient facts.

Let's start with the fairly obvious:
* Their pals in Berlin has a plan Unternehmen Seelöwe - to invade Britain.
* Strict Neutrality (like the Netherlands) would mean no mobilisation in 1939, a tiny army and hastily recalled reservists to oppose the Paratroopers who later dropped into Crete and the reinforcing (warning - trigger word) small boats shipping their mobile divisions to the south coast by night.
* Their pals in Berlin wanted an Empire, some in Eastern Europe, but why fight the Russian Bear when you can reclaim Tanganyka and Togoland.

* Their pals in Rome had their eyes on a new Roman Empire: Albania, Greece, Abyssinia, and several points beyond. British Somaliland, and Egypt (because they require canal access to link their territories.

* Their pals in Tokyo attacked Malaya simultaneous with Pearl Harbor, invaded Hong Kong and had designs on Burma and Bengal.

* The commerce raiding inherent in the axis wars of conquest would inevitably wreak havoc on the worlds largest merchant fleet - even if did their best to remain neutral. Submarines are an imprecise weapon, and commerce raiders can't fuck about with "They probably won't radio in our location".

War was inevitable.
Not everybody realised at the time, I'll cut Chamberlain some slack - but not "friends of Addie", like Halifax and Rothermere.
The benefit of hindsight, including the Nazi regime's own records, means anybody talking of neutrality now is talking shit.

* Would Hitch advocate sitting quietly while the final solution was enacted?
* Would he like to see a world map where the Warsaw pact extends to France, and his beloved empire is under American control? Because the Nazis can't win, so that's what'll happen.