Mailwatch(ed) Forum

davidjay wrote:Bit of America love, bit of something I did last week because I live here honest, bit of seventies, bit of homophobia, bit of dirty foreigns, bit of scroungers, bit of I'm not racist they're not all bad, bit of poor but honest, bit of misogyny. Same as ever.

Put all of the above into ChatGP and you've got Littlejohn articles with no input from him forever. I say sack the fucker.

https://www.smry.ai/proxy?url=https://w ... ion_mobile

More budget bollocks. Basically a list of insults. Cunt.

In summary
Starmer looks like Max Headroom (he doesn't) that's my joke. Max Headroom everyone, come on laugh. Hey remember when I called Starmer Max Headroom? that was my idea. Max Headroom anyone?
OK what if I spell Sir Keir Surkeir? Yeh that's me who thought that up.
Hey Rachel Reeves, she's crap for performing far better than everyone predicted and must go along with Starmer, utter bastards.
Speaking of Starmer he looks like Max Headroom.

And again, a copyright lawyer could enjoy themselves with that case.

Max Headroom burned brightly for a brief moment in the 80s. On Channel 4.

At least his Only Fools And Horses/Minder/Porridge schtick lands with his core demographic who grew up in the three channel days when any old shite would be watched by 20million people.

Other inspiration came from listening to Ken Bruce playing the Eagles on Slippers FM

It doesn’t matter how much mascara you wear, Rachel, you can’t hide your lyin’ eyes.

soulboy wrote: ↑Tue Dec 02, 2025 5:51 pm Max Headroom burned brightly for a brief moment in the 80s. On Channel 4.

At least his Only Fools And Horses/Minder/Porridge schtick lands with his core demographic who grew up in the three channel days when any old shite would be watched by 20million people.

And often was.

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Why driving dangerously and almost killing someone is just fine if they're possibly a filthy immigrant, by a total cunt.

Comments will have you losing the will to live. They can roughly be split into:

1. Hur hur, do you get points for each one you hit?
2. Riding while potentially foreign ought to be a capital crime.
3. Somehow Sadiq Khan is to blame.
4. She got off lightly because she's a BBC star (???).
5. So if she did this but I can drive home after 20 pints...
6. Women drivers, eh?

Basically, the "story" is "Woman involved in minor road traffic accident". The kind of thing that happens multiple times every single day.

And the cunt somehow turns it into a bigoted rant.

It must be a kind of skill.

Seriously - has anyone ever tried getting ChatGPT or some other so-called AI bollocks to generate a Littlejohn column?

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 10:48 am Seriously - has anyone ever tried getting ChatGPT or some other so-called AI bollocks to generate a Littlejohn column?

Okay. Here it is :

Honestly, some mornings you wake up and wonder whether the country’s been quietly replaced overnight with a theme-park version designed by a committee that’s never met a normal human being.
Take the latest wheeze from the local council — sorry, “Department for Urban Flourishment” — which has decided that bin collections will now occur once every epoch, presumably to reduce our “carbon footprint”, though it’s doing nothing for the distinct pong wafting through the streets like a budget immersive theatre experience.
According to the leaflet (printed on glossy paper thick enough to stop a tank shell), we’re supposed to sort our rubbish into seven separate micro-categories. One for “general waste”, one for “food waste”, one for “soft plastics”, one for “hard plastics”, and — my personal favourite — a bin exclusively for “items that might offend the recycling machinery’s emotional wellbeing”. Meanwhile, the rats have unionised and are demanding better working conditions.
But of course, it’s not their fault. Oh no. We’re told this is all part of the council’s “vision for a sustainable future”. A future, one assumes, where half the population has moved out due to the stench, and the other half is still trying to remember which bin the yoghurt pot goes in if it once thought about containing dairy.
And don’t get me started on the trains. Or rather, the theoretical transportation network that apparently “operates” in this country. Every day brings a new excuse: too hot, too cold, too many leaves, not enough leaves, the wrong type of driver blinked at the wrong type of signalling box. By this point, it would be less stressful to commute by migrating goose.
But the real icing on this organic, sustainably sourced, gluten-free cake? We’re told to accept all this with a smile because it’s “progress”. Progress towards what, exactly? A nation where it takes longer to navigate the recycling instructions than it does to negotiate a peace treaty?
You couldn’t make it up. Except apparently someone has — and we’re all living in it

I was at a loss in the first paragraph as to why he was gloating at the thought of a young man on a moped breaking his neck.
But he clears he that one up, asylum seekers of course being sub human.

The majority of these moped jockeys appear to be young foreign nationals – some of them living in asylum hotels, according to a Home Office report into migrants working in the gig economy.

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 10:48 am Seriously - has anyone ever tried getting ChatGPT or some other so-called AI bollocks to generate a Littlejohn column?

I posted "his" view of Mailwatched about three years ago, when ChatGPT was still in black & white.

It was remarkably good.

kreuzberger wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 6:14 pm

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 10:48 am Seriously - has anyone ever tried getting ChatGPT or some other so-called AI bollocks to generate a Littlejohn column?

I posted "his" view of Mailwatched about three years ago, when ChatGPT was still in black & white.

It was remarkably good.

625 or 405?

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 6:45 pm

kreuzberger wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 6:14 pm

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 10:48 am Seriously - has anyone ever tried getting ChatGPT or some other so-called AI bollocks to generate a Littlejohn column?

I posted "his" view of Mailwatched about three years ago, when ChatGPT was still in black & white.

It was remarkably good.

625 or 405?

As it’s Littlejohn shouldn’t it be 525 for Never Twice the Same Color?

zuriblue wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 9:48 pm

Boiler wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 6:45 pm

kreuzberger wrote: ↑Fri Dec 05, 2025 6:14 pm

I posted "his" view of Mailwatched about three years ago, when ChatGPT was still in black & white.

It was remarkably good.

625 or 405?

As it’s Littlejohn shouldn’t it be 525 for Never Twice the Same Color?

In which case, 30 frames/second rather than 29.97

https://www.smry.ai/proxy?url=https%3A% ... 1970s.html

Angela Rayner is planning on using the worker's rights bill to sneakily extend, erm, worker's rights. Employers will be forced - forced, I tell you! - to let staff join a union. Next thing you know, they'll be out on strike, refusing to bury the dead. Of course, some say my criticism of her and Reeves is misogynistic. Of course they would, defending a yo-yo knickered common as muck dirty Manc slag with ideas above her station.

Seriously, "return to the seventies" is about as scary as "chaos with Ed Miliband", these days.

Boring, repetitive, lazy, bigoted cunt.

And yet most weeks he's pining for the 70s.

https://www.smry.ai/proxy?url=https%3A% ... Marsh.html

Must be a slow news day, because here's a familiar standby: caahncil jobsworths fining people over petty stuff, all part of an attack on civil liberties and stealth communism or something. As ever, we get one side of the story, such as it is, and the clichés come thick and fast. Traffic wardens getting ipads and flat screen TVs for hitting targets? And the implication is hovering there - it wasn't always like this, something changed, not going to say it, but we all know...

Lazy, mendacious cunt.

Much easier to pick on a 86-year-old than confront a gang of stroppy youths drinking Special Brew and making a bloody nuisance of themselves.

Gangs of youths drinking Special Brew???

Is he sponsored to crowbar in a Dad's Army reference every column or something? First column of his I've looked at in years, I swear he copies and pastes from previous. The lazy cunt.