[Malcolm Armsteen]

Back in 2000-2005 when I was at the Department for Education there was concerted effort to get people working from home. There were two practical reasons, one was the difficulties of transport after years of Tory neglect, meaning that people were commuting for long periods in horrible conditions. The other was the cost of office accommodation. In those days the DfE had two offices in Westminster, one of which was Sanctuary Buildings in Great Smith Street, reputedly the most expensive office space in London. SB is an old Edwardian building, seven floors, which has been entirely hollowed out and the interior replaced with a glass tube, on the walls of which grow exotic plants, including palm trees, which are serviced by squads of abseiling gardeners. No, really.

Of course in those days (Labour controlled) we were concerned about improving the work-life balance (we were strong on that) of the civil servants, and reducing costs. Now it's about providing a captive market for Pret and the giveaway papers and providing huge sums for the hedge funds and property developers who profit from renting or leasing office space at huge cost.

[Bones McCoy]

Won't somebody think of the abseiling gardeners?

[Bones McCoy]

Are they being kept busy? That's all that matters.

Make sure they're not taking among themselves.
See how that ended for Louis XVI and the Czar.

[Boiler]

Don't forget that many a pension fund depends upon the commercial property market.

[Nigredo]

[Bones McCoy]

Country Smogg's back to work plan suffers an early faceplant.

Civil servants ordered back to work sent home again because office is full

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/20 ... ack-space/

[Boiler]

Statistical multiplexing, innit?

[Samanfur]

Not sure whether to put this here or in the Brexit thread:

[Nigredo]

I sincerely doubt he's ever held a vacuum cleaner in his life (except for maybe a photo op?)

This is the nonsense Liz Hurley was banging on about, how it took an extra 10 minutes to dry her hair because draconian unelected Brussels bureaucrats forced everyone to use underpowered hairdryers.

[Andy McDandy]

You can email Mr Rees-Mogg with ideas on [email protected] or send by mail to Jacob Rees-Mogg, Cabinet Office, 70, Whitehall, London SW1A 2AS.

Mark your correspondent "Brexit Opportunity Ideas" and tell Mr Rees-Mogg you are an Express reader.

Oh bless.

Anyway, here are his top 9 ideas:

1. Encourage fracking, shortcut rules on planning consultation via emergency act.
2. Abolish the EU regulations that restrict vacuum cleaner power to 1400 watts.
3. Remove precautionary principle restrictions (for instance) on early use of experimental treatments for seriously ill patients and GM crops.
4. Abolish rules around the size of vans that need an operator's licence.
5. Abolish EU limits on electrical power levels of electrically assisted pedal cycles.
6. Allow certain medical professionals, such as pharmacists and paramedics, to qualify in three years.
7. Remove requirements for agency workers to have all the attributes of a permanent employee.
8. Simplify the calculation of holiday pay (eg 12.07 percent of pay) to make it easier for businesses to operate.
9. Reduce requirements for businesses to conduct fixed wire testing and portable application testing.

So, hastily trained people in risky jobs, driving vehicles with no training, faulty wiring going unrepaired because it's too much faff, and anyway so what if the new employee gets electrocuted, they're only a fucking temp.

[Boiler]

I had a lot of involvement in no. 9 in my career - it could be a pain, nobody really wanted to do it but on one occasion it helped uncover a lot of safety issues in a fixed installation that had occurred over the passage of time.

[Watchman]

I assume he didn’t like what he got from the S*n, so he’s asked the same of the Express

[Crabcakes]

Given these are the top 9, and there were 20,000 submitted, I’d dearly love to see some of the worst. I’d be willing to bet the vast majority veer between plain fucking insane, flat-out unbridled racism, and nothing to do with the EU and never were.

[soulboy]

If they were really encouraging postal responses brexit opportunity #1 would have been crudely drawn cock and balls pictures, hotly followed by the brexit opportunity to send a freshly crimped turd to a cabinet minister.

[Boiler]

I'm surprised incandescent lightbulbs don't feature, but now that LEDs are almost equal to a bit of tungsten, maybe the drop in electric bills has hit home. I noticed the McMansion near me no longer has its statement lighting on 24 hours a day since it changed hands.

Whilst looking through the old Halford catalogue from 1939 to see what I could buy then (like drums of calcium carbide for my acetylene bike lamp - best for country roads) I noticed a 2A socket was deemed okay for a vacuum cleaner back then - implying they drew less than 500W from the mains.

[Nigredo]

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/ ... e-27163314

Reminder that Rees-Mogg said Theresa May should go when faced with 37% of the vote saying no confidence.

[Youngian]

This idiot is just plucking nonsense out of the ether. Interoperability measures, popular with consumers and manufacturers, are usually forged through international industry committees that governments have no wish to oppose. I'm sure most lay people understand why socket standardisation is no brainer regardless of what authority introduces more of it. Or are they thick as shit like Rees-Mogg?

[Andy McDandy]

Remember when he said a benefit of Brexit was the return of duty free?

Bit like saying you may have lost both legs, but think of the savings on shoes.

[Youngian]

Remember when he said a benefit of Brexit was the return of duty free?

Bit like saying you may have lost both legs, but think of the savings on shoes.

Duty free got a short term repreive following the introduction of the Single Market. A waste of time as French wine and Belgian fags are cheaper.

[Watchman]

The collector of tuition fees at Eton must be laughing all the way to the bank