[Boiler]

"The return of Mr. Mid Staffs"

[Malcolm Armsteen]

Lewis needs the whip withdrawn...

[Abernathy]

I see that Lloyd Russell-Moyle (former) MP has gone to the Green Party.

[Tubby Isaacs]

He wasn't treated very well in fairness.

[The Weeping Angel]

I do remember he tried to encourage the teaching of choking in schools.

[Abernathy]

I do remember he tried to encourage the teaching of choking in schools.

Really ?

[Andy McDandy]

Did you not have auto-erotic asphyxiation as an elective at your school?

[Boiler]

We must have done at mine, as I remember one pupil dying from it. This'd be about 1980.

[Youngian]

I see. 'Please don't do this or play on railtracks and pylons, kids' might be a better message.

[kreuzberger]

Postcards from the edge;

If you turn up to a dinner party hosted by a friend's new squeeze in Chiswick, and the story du jour concerns a tory, a bottle of poppers, an orange, various items of lingerie, and a ligature, don't mention it.

Believe me. It's really not worth it.

[Tubby Isaacs]

This is astonishing even from a serial gobshite.

Water bills are going up.... to fix exactly what you want fixed, after a long period when Ofwat (with the connivance of governments) kept the bills relatively low. They don't get fixed for free just because you nationalize it. The "no matter how you regulate it" is embarrassing stuff.

[Boiler]

Hang on... aren't they building a new reservoir in North Lincolnshire?

[Tubby Isaacs]

Yep, and in Cambridgeshire. Neither of these are all that far from Clive.

[Abernathy]

Tulip Siddiq seems to have been penalised for having an auntie that was the Prime Minister of Bangla Desh.